nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
