next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize
