I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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