Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize