have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
