No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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