love makes seman taste better
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
i need to put some appletini on your dick
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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