found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
