You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
