yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Dicks are not precious.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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