Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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