it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize