i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
When are your genitals available?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
