maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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