grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
