I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize