Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
