Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
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