you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
