whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
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