Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
