he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
