take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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