So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
