question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
