If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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