i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
