bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
foreskin is a definite game changer
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
