Slut skills are useful in every country.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
