talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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