Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Randomize
