I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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