You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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