Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Randomize
