would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
