Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Randomize
