Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
