Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
