I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
