I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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