its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
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