Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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