We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
