I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
So much rum. So many feels.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
