at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
