It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
