we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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