Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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