I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
