I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
